Monday, July 16, 2012

my pregnancy with ember: photos from the early weeks.

I didn't take many photos in the early weeks. Wait, I didn't take many photos of myself in the early weeks.
I actually was taking a lot of photography jobs in an effort to really gather together a good portfolio for showing online.

That ended up being one of the most stressful times I've ever had with photography. I did everything you're not supposed to do. I charged hardly anything, took every request, ignored my own style and completely devalued my work. I gave everything away. I ended up getting burnt out and by December, I was fairly certain that I did NOT want to be a photographer and that I needed to give up on something I'd been half heartedly chasing for too long.

When Neil was laid off, I even went as far as selling off all my equipment. I figured in a few months when he went back to work I would purchase another fairly nice camera for personal use. And everything else, well, I was done with it all anyways.

I hate that I put myself through that, and whenever I see others doing the same thing (and you will, if you're paying attention to other creative types, as most us creative types do) I so badly want to caution them about burn out, and truly valuing your work and to appreciate a slower climb when working toward achieving goals.

The first photo taken of me, which actually proves I'm pregnant, was taken at a Thanksgiving dinner by Neil's aunt. 15 weeks along.

My pregnancy with Ember: 15 weeks Pregnant, Nov. 2010

Then when I was out shopping a couple weeks later, I snapped a cell phone pic of the shirt I was thinking about buying, to get Neil's opinion. I couldn't believe how big the bump looked! 17 weeks.

17 weeks (2)

And, finally, when I decided to annouce my pregnancy on facebook and tumblr, I snapped another cell phone pic. 20 weeks here.

hi.

And looking back, I know these are fuzzy, and terrible quality. But I'm really ok with it. It wasn't until about 17-18 when my belly actually rounded out and I didn't just look like I ate too big of a lunch. I know lots and lots of people who take early belly photos... but, I just don't have that kind of tummy! I already rock some sort of pooch, even on my bikini days.

However, I do wish that I would have taken more day to day, life photos. Along with blogging, that just stopped. Which just isn't very like me. I have a couple cell phone pics, but most of that fall is pretty empty other than major holidays.

These photos make me so happy though, I was through the first trimester, and feeling excitement replace the anxiety. By this point pretty much everyone knew, it was still early enough that there was no reason to feel rushed or unprepared. It was pretty blissful actually.

I was able to just be pregnant, and completely happy about it.

2 comments:

  1. I think those photos are so beautiful Dani.
    so happy for you. I like your new blog and I hope you have lots of creative fun with it.

    ReplyDelete